Every single one of Zefrank’s videos resonate so well with me. It’s just being awkward and everything…..
When I was younger I had this feeling that there was this handbook that I had never gotten that explained how to be, how to laugh, what to wear, how to stand by yourself in the hallway. Everyone else looked so natural, like they’d all practiced together and knew exactly what to do, even just the way that they pushed the hair out of their face. My experience was pretty much the opposite. I was conscious of how I sat, how I smiled, and when I was alone with another person I had no idea what to do or what to say. I could just feel myself panic, it sucked.
I’d imagine what people were like when I wasnt around. How they’d compare notes on how I didn’t quite fit. Or even worse, they just wouldn’t notice. So, I tried to pick up the patterns. I wore what they wore and said what they said, I even wrote ‘smile more!’ on a stick note. And over time it sort of worked, in a way, I made a version of me that ‘fit in’, whatever that means. But as I grew older the patterns kept changing, and it took so much effort to keep learning them. And I was still stuck with the problem that I had started with, being terrified of the moment when my tricks stopped working.
I think it took me too long to learn something. That even though there is a thing called ‘fitting in’, that it’s something that you can learn and practice, those pages are so thin compared to who you are. That the way to become ‘natural’, like I wanted to be so badly, is by forgetting what you’re trying to be to other people. And, if there is a handbook, you probably get to write it yourself.
^This is how I feel waiting for translations to the manga Kyou no Kira-kun. What I decided to do is to try reading the raws. I’m literally spending an hour per chapter to try understanding the dialogue and everything in Chinese. Crying my butt off because I’m actually understanding it, and it’s so sad. SO. SAD. (My chinese is really bad so I legitimately proud of myself for being able to read it) Also my iphone really helps with translation ^-^.
Sam Spratt’s Print Giveaway
IN SLIGHTLY LESS SHORT: There will be 5 winners with prizes as follows:
1st PRIZE: (1 winner) Gilded Black Edition 3-pack: All 3 drippy golden masks are yours, all signed and inscribed. (Inscribed meaning I’ll write you a personal haiku about your eyebrows or whatever, I don’t care.)
2nd PRIZE: (2 winners) Pick O’ The Litter: Basically, almost any painting you see on www.samspratt.com you can get one signed and inscribed print of, a few example prints above.
3rd PRIZE: (2 winners) Any medium print from my standard store: Society6
Ships worldwide, will pick random winners in one week.
Staff coordinate WonderRocket (Wonder Rocket) on We Heart It. http://weheartit.com/entry/68966910/via/vintagemoriclassisloli
Wonder Rocket<3 The epitome of mori girl fashion!